www.vulture.com – All 82 ‘Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark’, Ranked

The best tales from Alvin Schwartz’s classic Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark book series are still etched into our memories. We rank the best stories, worst to best.

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twitter:title All 82 Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, Ranked
description The best tales from Alvin Schwartz’s classic Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark book series are still etched into our memories. We rank the best stories, worst to best.
twitter:description The best tales from Alvin Schwartz’s classic series are still etched into our memories.
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All Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark Ranked Intelligencer The Cut Vulture Strategist Curbed Grub Street Magazine Subscribe Give a Gift Subscription Buy Back Issues Current Issue Contents Sign In Account xml version encoding UTF- standalone no Profile Out Menu Close TV Movies Comedy Music Recaps What Stream Lists Books Theater Art Awards Podcasts Videos About Newsletters Insiders Festival Like Us Follow NYMag com New York Search Share Tweet Pin It Comments Leave Comment vulture lists Aug By Becca James Photo Stephen Gammell Harper Row movie hits theaters this weekend but true fans still remember original book series Alvin Schwartz s iconic short horror stories for children For many they were childhood staple powered by ghastly often unforgettable illustrations are etched into our memories and possibly inspired passion all things spooky But how good those really was published between late early spans three books More Tales Chill Your Bones yet only handful of made film cut Judging trailer includes fan favorites like Harold Red Spot undeniably two best collection Still there plenty duds honor release we revisited determine which tales hold up terms scariness have remained relevant over years This proved daunting given that each ends with funny section devoted lackluster gags undying themes abuse self-hatred sent chills spines along some old-fashioned scares So here go maybe don t read list at night Big Toe Unpopular opinion trilogy opener will appear is total dud Tasked catching reader attention after brief explainer introduction Strange Things story about filthy little boy finding harvesting big toe from ground add his family soup Problem owner shows looking its appendage Something percent foot control comes so I call bullshit on corpse post-dinner pre physical therapy Dead Man Brains Some weakest points come when fit gimmick rather than narrative Here re told game same way one your more annoying acquaintances might trick you never-ending Monopoly or You probably familiar however involves using food as substitute rotting relies darkened room disguise it such eyeballs grapes checks out ears dried apricots ingenious And goes body part corresponding another delectable until get hands They rubber gloves instead being filled something popcorn mud ice if isn WTF because both slightly inconvenient while also nothing consistency-wise hand Furthermore reading how-to even meant scare just inspire Viper Let dive sections these right away m not saying humor appreciate ending levity sort would avoid nightmares putting comedy letting shit kid most instantly forgettable frustratingly stupid Without giving too much let say could been avoided had protagonist checked peephole before opening her door totally well-meaning off window washer Attic Attics long history scary Often dark dusty horrors an attic can range ritual sacrifice adolescent incest confounding somehow least Although hints gruesome death man friend specifically Rupert dog Sam end hinges storyteller taking pause screaming AAAAAAAAAAAH banking somebody asking Why did scream finale He stepped nail Slithery-Dee simple line paired comic-strip-like presentation makes almost memeable Though never sees question safe assume sea monster who eats animals very curious creature tail stance human dare stroll coast seems ripe resident fish-man obsessive Guillermo del Toro treatment magic be top-ten darker Shape Water Alas would-be palate cleanser what sure otherwise horrifying making Bad News fact called baseball has absolutely do seminal sports Bears especially rude Instead introduced Leon Todd dudes played growing since graduated watching talking adults Both concerned prospects heaven imagine meeting idiots party Anyway kicks bucket he briefly course means travel back down Earth know bad news scheduled pitch tomorrow Seems satisfactory exactly want spared their uselessness Brown Suit Okay note wrote Maybe desensitized seemed reminiscent MacGyver episode terror-inducing tale After men prepared viewing funeral home respective wives decide color suit undertaker happy make switch undressing full-grown stiffs switches heads Sure life moves fast faster Who knows else day thanks ingenuity ll done Ba-Room set music Readers instructed tune Irish Washerwoman gives Third Class Dance Titanic vibe subjects dancing dead Yes O Leary Reilly bed completely unaware Are ba-room simply sound relationship rattle Thumpity-Thump closes second installment leaving desired A poltergeist old time revolves around terrorized chair thumps house Eventually takes break legs pointing decides dig hole where leg aim indeed find potential cause dread bury swiftly barely blip return hometown chairs rarin rampagin roun scarin folks wits idea prefer stable place sit fair Strangers less female superhero opens woman sitting train begins clockwork asks Because anyone wants taken engage asinine small talk she tells him ghost starts share thoughts existence spirits though asked Her response vanish Not does prove ghosts real quickly gets dude dream Hog haunted ex That song reminds them smell specific post-breakup Instagram posted themselves daring live dissolution breakup former seem inescapable Sometimes ended refuses move becomes bane hog able run car drive uses skill stalk flame worse When confronts albeit aggressive manner responds brisk walk enjoying myself How strike me Damn Talk getting gaslit Is Wrong wrong doesn necessarily mean quick entry appears directly follows similar cannot outrun horrible thing approach coupled insincere amount politeness saw portray earlier chasing point thinks lungs burst taps shoulder ask nerve Him cut-and-dry case assholes deserve eternity suffering together These people woods bother wife annoyed husband cuts head buries haunt murderous piece likes Epitomizing standard for-better-or-for-worse vows spins reveal tolerate T-h-u-p-p-p-p-p-p-p illustration accompanying looks alien lead believe invasion-laden treat extraterrestrial take us world Absolutely Sarah fucking numerous times aloof father upset Immediately already dickhead dad Honestly truly fulfill mission think sinister give humans raspberries No fruit babies giggle May Be Next Song Summer ditty dying perfect Morbid Catchy Definitely Girl Stood Grave presents theory easy test posits stand grave person buried below grab pull under Whether refers beneath grass darkest hell imaginable unclear Either meet fate unlikely why girl dollar bet She stick knife dirt plunges fancies realize lets pierce skirt first jerked falls tries leave Presumably spends help friends look later died fright fear itself stupidity cost Walk Now aptly portrays oneself greater unknown As walks road across mirror image eye contact terrified Try unable escape ourselves continue path becoming increasingly scared seemingly Spooky huh Thing ve established present self AF future faced skeleton decked black pants white shirt suspenders play cat-and-mouse following become bored eventually alone Years sick deteriorates lame slated age suppose influencer hit Lived Leeds Simple direct informs rhyme anything Others surprising clear warning keeping vigilant wake backstabbers speaking metaphors literally advises stay lookout penknife-wielding killer unless die blood runs Wait till Martin Comes shelter rain recurring theme throughout finds abandoned Well except bunch cats keep insisting hightails fails utilize creepiness offer White Wolf cracked top weren predictable Want Keep promises Or Bill butcher stint meat cleaver hangs chainmail hunt wolves overpopulating region job obsolete promise kill wolf again Does try bait remaining lamb torn pieces predator lot written moral pretty chill kids Alligators actually having bit moment now gator fever spreads From Crawl Chicago Chance Snapper alligators come-up rank see convinced trying turn himself sons enough entire vanishes never-before-seen spotted local watering happened scariest explanation disappearance throw hospital everyone aren any Terrible advice Up summer either Cemetery Soup delicious particular sounds appetizing With carrots green beans corn barley onions potatoes snitch beef salt pepper chef kiss catch soupbone certainly belongs found cemetery Yet own soup-maker throws serving herself succulent Thanks Vector Marketing scam company down-and-out sell kitchen knives during college pyramid scheme hopeless resorts cold-calling anywhere warehouse parking hours Hey mister calls employee heading Nice sharp nice spews sales dollars Two five continues adding mama mark dodges got town sits comfortably chiller chilling Faster passing offers certain type fueled anxiety frantic drumbeat ghostly drum beats watches brother front heard terror lack Pair frustration eyes creeped Rings Fingers If tagline Don mad Daisy dies finery robber jewelry Specifically wedding ring smaller stunning ruby companion pries open casket started bloat rings stuck swollen fingers Dude determined surprise start bleed stir Scared trips onto unaffected collects belongings bleeds Serves Oh Susannah semi-charming used sing replaced dorm-room nightmare Jane students living hearing hummed irritating Surely my roommate yells stop humming straight pulls covers discovers Convinced well awakens then trails wonder whether decapitated gone interrupted Church smallest happens We Larry seen driving topless Jeep storm Good bro going parade rained Passing cabin drives further church seek refuge parks gas guzzler cover dry bone feels pew stretch wait lightning crashes illuminating full ghouls waiting graves At happen mercilessly tear guy apart limb mocking chosen mode transportation says Baa-a-a sheep noise worst Footsteps eerie entirely While Liz doing homework swears hears someone sister reason footsteps belong check upstairs Later footprints snow result well-executed prank use ketchup Cats Eyes Glowing animal conspiracy theories illustrates perfectly through peer soul pets sleep extraterrestrials plotting dissection There Hit light manage courage expose truth Such Happen title indicates so-it-goes relates elderly townswoman doctor -year-old killed via spells grandpa suggests livestock mysteriously blame livelihood ran cat silly auxiliary character witches style haven dates tired trope mystical cruel lady Hand Situated classic acts comedown Starting slow Tom Pattison stupidly comments work every once ever frighten should different bump learns dismembered reaches weeks turns clearly traumatized supposed ragged stump oozing although hand-on-hand crime outshine remind Bess twisted journey fortune-teller majority involve mystic word unheeded John Nicholas visits beloved horse Only worried mostly laughs forgets retires sells ride Remembering fortune chuckles last good-bye bones far corner farm Once locates bends pat skull rattlesnake residence carcass bites kills solid compelling longer need feel may suggest watch Wildling streaming Ghost Bloody finger-banging period predictably shut bloody joke abysmal guitar telling Band-Aid Seemingly wasn Guests impart messed-up lesson whatever flat couple traveling visit stops complete stranger rent rooms flag cake coffee accept money kindness comfy leaves next morning server diner claim stayed burned ago returns spent free knowing in-laws Dream adaptation visual sense pales comparison haunting vein odd no-stakes overnight Lucy Morgan artist needs change scenery hotel Prior trip trapdoors windows nailed plans based premonition receives shown pale-faced black-eyed hair recipe disaster escapes without scratch Wreck movement interesting Fred Jeanne Christmas dance tinsel put crashed requests dropped claims left acquiesces went accident realizes phone number wreck ahead caught fire Upon closer inspection pinned steering wheel unbelievable returned scene couldn Tinder turning Window Drum other innocuous inanimate objects neither Luckily easily Do Come Conspiracy influenced Manfred Mann Came deep disheveled Wounded battle stuffed soldier undaunted repeat came record deal Bus Stop horrific hitting ghosted Perhaps discovering fallen Thus Ed Cox picked Joanna Finney bus save kind gesture blossomed burgeoning stands sets mother better spine-chilling romantic snafus Clinkity-Clink Even jubilant titles Following serves lines wide staring everything seeing Depending honest referencing strain computer mistake semi-willing ignoring obvious tilts toward latter gravedigger rob rest plays Rhianna robbed laying beat demanding paid excerpt Wind Bizze bizze BUZ-OOOOOO-O-O-O Money Clinkity-clink clinkity-clink Whoooo Gravedigger Lordy lordy jam Trouble longest entries Unfortunately dated Amityville Horror movies spin commentary teenagers poltergeists manifestation hormones normal ambitious doubt mind Carrie matter-of-fact delivery Somebody Fell Aloft studio dwellers bunk-bed sharers slept aloft space-saving specter falling upper rigging ship cold hard floor murder presumed shipmates stowaway shoves overboard raises push partner Was simplest Case Sullivan walking chaos wherever Unbeknownst revealed informed elaborate Weird Blue Light ship-related translates present-day danger weird blue referring old-school schooner aflame water forget current digital devices posing harming great Sort tell bought blue-light-blocking glasses vanquish recommending Voice reality-TV show knew connection trials stardom heavily neglect Ellen name threaten coming repeatedly parents avail finally rescue tormenting needed parental Remind raised Baby Boomers inherited inevitably trickle generations Babysitter hasn aged spawn inside First landlines practically ringing incessantly modern audiences silent ring-related Regardless apprehended cops creepily smile babysitter temporary brood shake Horse new Seriously pleasure involving devilish ways sometimes turned lying buck bucks exacting revenge placing cursed saddle rightful rode discard Carry Basket please love carry groceries Samaritan offering basket face bundled scarf sooner hear freaks disembodied began biting scarier reinforces notion helping others grief dangerous thought Satin Evening Gown rented runway scoured thrift shops general buying clothes brand Capitalism invited wear thrifty outfit pawnshop beautiful satin evening gown mood wearing wonderful dizzy enjoyment insanely An autopsy poisoned embalming fluid pawnbroker garment helper must rubbed entered skin sweaty Word wise wash second-hand items Old Woman Skin bop advantage leisure season awhile Cold Clay Speaking bops chart-topping country Set ballad star-crossed lovers farmer daughter farmhand To sends uncle broken heart keeps atop knocks requested notices clay handkerchief warm secret clean discover addition Basically Trisha Yearwood Love Boy Pet travels Mexico upon cute puppy insist bring border accomplish pet rabies-infected rat Thought reflect anger Mexican workers United States illegally competed jobs held Americans according notes worrisome frightening provided allowing opportunity shape bias Haunted House female-executed murdered lover haunts alive preacher catches wind happening remedy spook hidden properly instructing ring-clad pinky finger plate Sunday dudebro passed sticks matter leads confession hanging sweet justice Hearse imagery notch ten exact worms crawl describe decomposition choice descriptions include stomach slimy pus pours whipping cream spread slice bread eat Sounds suspiciously Flutternutter sandwich underworld Cat Paw Spittin yowlin phrase woman-cat confused stealing Jed Smith Ham bacon smokehouse match she-cat burglar shotgun manages shoot paw inspect women safely steal hate Room One serviceable praised elsewhere assure took aback assessed situation crowded involved hearse driver stalking Joseph Blackwell calling ignores formidable situations known humankind office elevator squishes realizing plummet Shopping Bag contain surrounding theft punishment accidentally places shopping bag errands steals assuming recently Joke faints follow ambulance order deliver wouldn poor lose stuff devious Hello Kate twice ghosting Connors headed popular pastime universe Thinking possible Faherty year danced reach essentially close touched wanted perhaps guilt silenced Me Tie Dough-Ty Walker Little Black Dog suspense spooks dogs siren lure phantom canine ready sport hounds hunted equal measure survival rate zero reveals pending doom Everyone willing Wendigo tradition campfire namesake mythical man-eater satiate intentions greedy desires Told focuses ability swoop victims feet burn Mirror Mary providing summon behind legend Growing figured locking bathroom lights Turns didn arbitrary somewhat exhausting numbers likely angry disturbed fret vanquished flip Hook car-related park frisky parentals interrupting business report interrupts playing stereo prisoner hook escaped nearby prison armed argues pack sexist boyfriend pissy Girls always afraid girlfriend rationally immediate area Before agrees believes laid squelch toxic masculinity invites cocoa asshole declines attached handle oldie goodie High Beams Another terrify rural truck tails flashing brights Given size disparity -wheeler glaring rage twist warn seat Each villain rose stab flashed shadows Chilling Will Remember cheat confusing open-ended instructions page busts dealing plague Paris baby Parisian staying fetch medicine runaround everywhere initially related language barrier arrives locate unhelpful staff gaslights thinking reality disposed remodeled fuck Apparently bear panic large-scale government against Curse remains terrifying form topical Centered holdovers culture associated fraternities hazing horrendous fraternity disbanded members suspended indirectly losing murdering pledges worry arrested narrator assures frat crazy trauma article Bed allegory capitalism supposedly spectacular view patients Richard example patient pills nightstand ensure attack His plan works delights assumes previous described facing blank brick wall neighboring building emptiness unlike settle backstabbing co-worker rejoice envelopes final days postcapitalist Appointment Short small-town square near beckoned begs grandfather city allows strength confront Death unexpectedly apologetic explaining beckon grandson surprised downtown appointment afternoon Wonderful Sausage Butchery fine trade backed hearty unique masters access tools Enter Samuel Blunt Franklin famous bringing Alice irritated disposes sausage moved jerk townspeople buy strange finessed became huge Greed killing feed newfound fame Then managed dawned dim eating Seeking taste special fed grinder appalling process abhorred cannibalism spookier blatant sexism explicitly perpetrated school nurses friendly cheerful among traits bite fingernails resent plot studying tie cord closet spooked anticipated career derailed Bride one-two punch marriage epitome wonders independence step bride individualism Calling shittier parts society invisible missing search executed week disastrous credence term trunk Cue Wife Aaron Kelly entrapment spend features experience happiness security quite frankly extremely difficult refusing coffin Asserting shitty convince insurance pay widow chance remarry chase suitor deadweight cries unanswered seeking-shelter-from-the-storm level beach screams drip ceiling followed voice yelling silence deafening laugh downstairs dragging heavy stairs running Morning alarm setting calculator sleepy haze Waking bells Ida service rushes congregation unfamiliar Finally recognizes escaping few garments ripped shreds undead relatable real-life transcends basic late-for-work naked-in-front-of-co-workers disasters Just Delicious George bully Mina timid neighbor mentions brushes Defeated conversation prepare feeling peckish pick liver cooked eaten Worried react secure Cannibalism Middle public delays crowd drunk bros drop whom propping Jim ditch writhe Sally frightened cars draw yourself male gaze curve flying land super-scary-because-it-could-so-easily-happen-to-you red spot pimple bugbite God bedbugs possibilities unpleasant transformation occurred unbeknownst Add unavoidable urge screwed hot-compress route hoping blemish puss-pop shitload spiders crawling Charlotte Web Horrifying Fittingly featured updated Originally scarecrow created dissatisfied lives Named routinely fathom healthy outlet unhappiness curse kick harmless object pent-up hostility exhibited farmers replica vengeful payback skins bodies bake sun widely-remembered reminder wrongdoings consequences renewed source Related Unnerving Old-School Kids Tags picks alvin schwartz Most Viewed Wake Alex Trebek Day Fianc Returns Couples Drama Pharrell Ready Reveal Gets Unnaturally Recap Homework Assignments Person Worthy Replacing Ken Jennings Promoted links Taboola Latest mins Best Action Hulu Right Bourne Identity Air Force Deep Sea overnights p Star Trek Discovery Looking Can irradiate personality buffering Netflix Introducing Linear Channels France Mon Ami Could feature bigger mix Seductively Deck Halls Trailer HBO Max Dating Show Dates Twelve reasons yes Dash Lily Boot Aunt Lillian k Mrs Basil E weep Megan Thee Stallion Announces Debut Album Through rough ass felt lil covid- Institution Creek Cave Shuts Down Permanently cultural venue loses online YouTube Canceled Its Annual Rewind reminisce Karmageddon rules Buffy Cast Supports Stacey Abrams Spike Theory Relationships timing law Selena Movie Producer Sues Quintanilla Family Over Series Moctesuma Esparza seeking million alleged breach contract underrated Robert Benchley Master Nothing chat Merrill Markoe learned favorite Algonquin humorist single dropping Billie Eilish Therefore Am Video Might Make Miss Malls fitting fun songs review Freaky Sweetest Body-Swap Slasher See Year Vince Vaughn Kathryn Newton clever conventions biggest streak sincerity Alison Willmore cmas Highs Lows Ohs CMA definitely drama-free zone super bowl lv Weeknd Headline Super Bowl Halftime screen Valley Tears Historical Fiction Today Grim Reality Israeli drama unsettlingly ironic American alike awards Gothams Nominate Five Female-Directed Films Feature Time showed nominations elongated role Eva Green Answers Every Question Have Dreamers lots nude scenes desperate care Rachel Handler psa fooled believing vape Xbox Asks People Please Vaping Into Their Xboxes Already subscriber Log link magazine subscription Email x receive newsletter inbox Sorry problem signing Contact Media Kit Hiring Press Trademark Privacy Terms Ad Choices Sell My Info Vox Network copy LLC rights reserved